Notes To Myself

new blog

2009-11-24T04:36:00.001-07:00

Intranaut is now up and running.

new blog

2009-11-21T07:24:00.003-07:00

I will begin a new blog, Intranaut, within the next several days. (An astronaut explores outer space; an intranaut explores inner space.)

If you wish to be on the distribution list, send an email to me and it will be done. [See email address at the right. Substitute @ for (AT).]

George

the particulars

2009-11-13T06:46:00.004-07:00

It doesn't matter so much what I believe in terms of the particulars of the Christian story. What happened, happened. What did not happen, did not happen. What matters is what I do with what I am. And the particulars of that don't matter so much either. What matters is that my dualistic tendencies move in harmony with the nondual.
Then all is well.

mucking it UP

2009-11-13T05:51:00.009-07:00

What I am struck with this morning is comprehending the universe forming into human-ness and the human-ness in turn opening to the universe, and especially in the example given in the Christ-figure. Though I have been deeply disturbed and outraged by what often passes as "christian," I appreciate my Christian roots with the insistence that the Source deliberately, purposefully took on human form and lived a human life. A good story any way you look at it.

The realm of the dual (twoness, oppositeness, splitness) and the realm of the nondual became as one. Here is the way Bruno Barnhart puts it: "The Christ-event is the incarnation of nonduality" (his italics, p. 110, The Future of Wisdom).

Something shifted in the universe. Now the door was open for new God-Humans to be born. The phenomenon of Christ showed it could be done, blazed the trail, opened the womb-doors.

The Light opened into the Muck. Now it is our turn, our responsibility, to keep the pathway open. We are the universe embodying. Our job requirements are to: (1) be aware of this, and (2) deliberately cooperate with the process, with the procession of these energies. We are the cosmos in the flesh.

a fig leaf hastily plucked

2009-11-12T00:37:00.003-07:00

Self-pain, self-problems are a referent for "you," bookmarks of consternation to mark your place. Without them you would have to face the horror of complete nothingness. You cannot bear the possibility that you do not exist, that you are a figment of your imagination, a fig leaf hastily plucked and maintained to cover your nakedness, your naked essence. Better to be a suffering character on a manufactured stage than open to the vast no-thing you are.

stfu

2009-11-12T00:28:00.004-07:00

Self-conversations are conducted to convince myself I am alive. I just absolutely must hear my echo. Self-talk, the continuous invention of the melodrama of me, the creation of myself out of very thin air.

diversion

2009-11-11T10:22:00.002-07:00

In the realm of spirit, it is important to not look at or look for the fruits of our actions, not only because we drop immediately into a second-order reality, but we are diverted into a realm of being whose only fruit is the looking for fruit.

phantoms of the mind

2009-11-10T05:09:00.003-07:00

All consciousness states are phantasies (phantoms of the mind). We cannot not phantasize. Unless.

And only a small percentage of earth's population has ever even attempted this unless route. It occurs only with a combination of one's intent and willingness and the grace of the universe, of God, our Source. This is the report of the spiritual explorers of consciousness states, the intranauts, the teachers whose explorations I follow, and at whose findings I place my base camp and whose tracks I follow.

As for me, I am still a phantasy addict, moving in and out of them, learning as I go. The Source is gracious, allowing more and more room, more space between them. I dwell more and more in bare naked awareness.

My phantasies have always been less of a personal nature, anyway, and more on a cosmic scale. But a phantasy is a phantasy is a phantasy. And this is where we humans live. Phantastic!

states of consciousness (continued)

2009-11-10T04:46:00.004-07:00

A few posts ago I wrote of 3 states of consciousness: horizontal, vertical, cosmic (or spherical). A problem with delineating states of consciousness in this way is that one may begin, in "class"ifying oneself to feel inferior or superior. Inferior, because one does not experience a particular state and thinks one should and therefore is deficient in some way. Superior, because one believes that one experiences these states and many others do not, so that one is in a class of one's own or else hanging out with the other cosmic nerd elite.

And yet these consciousness states exist (and others). What to do?

A way out of this self-ranking is to realize there is only one consciousness state that allows approach to and merging with our Source -- bare nakedness --a stripping of all thought, all imagery, all desire, all whim, all fantasy no matter how "wonderful" and "pure" and "good."

Reduced to ashes. And then not even ashes. Becoming as nothing. And not even nothing. All other consciousness states than this one are fantasies, dreams, illusions. Take heart. If it is to be named, a name for such a bare naked consciousness state is love.

Don't get all caught up in that though. Such a word sets off such a chain of fantasies that one may not surface for aeons.

one foot hopping

2009-11-09T07:55:00.005-07:00

What is the sound of one foot hopping?
George's 20th day using a walker.
Poor baby!

Tomorrow, maybe, pins protruding from 2 of the toes
on the "corrugated" foot will be removed and this
bandage that has been on since the inception of God
will be removed. Maybe the doc will even take the staples
or roofing nails or whatever they use these days out too.

Then I can perhaps begin the process of flattening out this
reconstructed mass into a serviceable weight-bearing unit
and begin visiting my wino and street-bum friends downtown again.

If I sound whiny, I would prefer that
you recontextualize it as impatience.

I know. I know. There are many a lot worse off.
But this is the life I am in charge of
and this is the one I want back on the road.

tach-ometers, isness, and self-traps

2009-11-08T05:23:00.009-07:00

Contemplation, sitting with God, is not so much a detachment, as is often said, though I understand what that means, but an attachment, a joining of two forces, two energies that have always been together and are now as a joyous communion, co-mune-ion, laughing happily in each other's presence, neither of which can do without the other. Or perhaps could do, but life would be stark and grim. (I speak here of God and not of the Godhead, though the Godhead is present, always present, how could it not be?) God and I are very much attached to each other. In this sense, contemplation is pure attachment.

This is different from the generic mindfulness approach where one systematically detaches from everything.

* * *
To live with God is NOT to abandon the affairs of this life, but to live in the isness. One can continue to attend to as much detail as one's particular level of obsessive-compulsiveness demands, but only out of the isness, this flow of IS. One is nowhere but in the isness, this ever-flowing process of unfolding.

* * *
"...the failure to let ourselves participate in being contracts our awareness into a separative mode of cognition. . . ." (Kelley, Meister Eckhart on Divine Knowledge)

We hold back. We will allow ourselves to do no more than the actions of the little roles we have created for ourselves, the self-defined bounds beyond which we do not dare to open. We restrict our lives to manageable proportions, following some recipe we have concocted or inherited.

"I shall live to this extent and no more. "I have defined the character by which I am known and I will continue living up to it (or down to it)." "I am afraid of becoming different than the way I have always imagined myself to be." "I know the way the world is and I am going to continue responding to it in this way." "I am going to wear this same outfit (known as "me") for the rest of my earthly days." "Other people will be upset if I am who I really am." And so on.

"...the failure to let ourselves participate in being contracts our awareness into a separative mode of cognition. . . ."

Once we contract our awareness we fool ourselves into thinking that the world and ourselves is that big and no bigger. We have taken a contract out on ourselves and successfully killed or maimed our souls. We separate ourselves from life and fool ourselves into thinking that the separation is what life is.

states of human consciousness

2009-11-07T04:59:00.012-07:00

There is vertical thinking and horizontal thinking.

Horizontal thinking proceeds on a straight and narrow line (sometimes widening) from premise (one's starting point) to conclusion (a satisfactory, for the moment, end result). One feels satisfied. One has "thought it through."

Horizontal thinking is just like it says, concerned with the horizon -- a point "over there" (considered to be in "the future") that one wants to reach. Horizontal thinking is ratio logic, estimating odds and probabilities, the ratios of various indicants to "success" to indicants of "failure." Ratio logic, hence called "rational."

Horizontal thinking is considered to be rational thinking, not just in the ratio of success/failure sense I have just described, but also in the sense of a value judgment. To be thought rational is a social judgment that brings its own rewards. Horizonatal thinkers often do not engage (at least on purpose) in vertical thinking, considering it as irrational, fraudulent, untrustworthy, and suspicious.

Vertical thinking disregards linear time, realizing and experiencing now as the only time there is. All knowledge is present now. What one needs to know is present now. We are already at the horizon, all horizons. It is called vertical thinking because we plunge into its depths and open to its heights of conscious awareness. Vertical thinkers can and do think horizontally but tend to regard it as an overly simplified procedure that has little bearing on the vibrant world of everchanging possibility.

Each of these two ways, admittedly oversimplified in my presentation, is a form of consciousness, a consciousness state. Both consciousness states can be cultivated and there are valid and honorable ways of doing so.

I wish to point to a third way. I call it cosmic thinking, or cosmic awareness. Horizontal thinking has a definite linear point of view. "I" am "here," at "this point," and wish to get "there," at "that point." Vertical thinking has a curvilinear point of view. I can "rise above" my situation and see the arc of its significance. I can "sink below" my situation and see the roots and soil of its beginnings and its nurturance. With horizontal or linear thinking, I am more fixed in time to comprehend my situation and its solutions. With vertical thinking, I exist, am fixed, more in space.

With cosmic thinking/awareness, I am neither fixed in time nor space. I am an omnipresent being and all "problems" and "solutions" continuously flow through. This state of consciousness has variously been called kensho, Christ consciousness, Lila, and what the old Zen master Bankei referred to as the realm of the Unborn. This state of consciousness, no matter what label we give it, will at one point become the normal consciousness state of humankind.

As my friend Ken McIntosh says, compassion is the key.

Where compassion drops off, consciousness stops. Compassion for one's own linear situation helps produce linear or horizontal thinking. Compassion for all below and all above helps produce vertical thinking or consciousness. Compassion for and with the entire cosmos, infinite and in every "direction," helps produce cosmic consciousness.

to my friend on Navajo Road

2009-11-06T05:34:00.005-07:00

A friend, a fine codger who clearly sees through the pithiness of the world and expresses it in his life style and in his fine wry manner, sent a letter to me the other day containing a green disc about 3 inches in diameter made of a soft but firmly tough waffle-ly design, of simple elegance, obviously concocted with an intent of opening obstructive jar lids. No logo, which I like. The folded sheet of letter paper surrounding it contained these words in his own penmanship (you remember penmanship don't you?)-- Get a grip!

I love that man, (1) for his motivation and action (the two don't always go together you know, (2) for having such a device at hand (the epitome of its kind), (3) for sending me the exact message I needed to hear at the exact right moment (we haven't talked for quite some time, our conversational high-wire artistic feats of derring-do generally taking place at the parking lot of Basha's or over a cup of coffee in what passes for their coffee corner), (4) for the immediate use to which I put my green waffle grid grip device (GWGGD) after sitting and admiring it for some moments with chuckles of appreciation that are great medicine unavailable at any pharmaceutical supply store, which was, (5) using it on the right handle of my walker for exactly the right compression needed to soften the nerve and bone ache (which I have been bearing like any stoic marine) of my right hand in supporting my weight while my left wussy foot heals. during these 2+ weeks.

Jim, though you are some years my senior and I feel advised to call you Sir, that Sir is a measure of profound respect. Maybe someday I can grow up to be more like you, (Now don't get all weepy, that is part of a callous move to get you to buy me the next cup of coffee.)

Love to you in our mutual Geezerdom and our eternal models of role.

I've got a grip, Brother!

Thank you!

the silver cord

2009-11-05T11:41:00.006-07:00

I know I'm supposed to be writing about things like how those Yankees and Phillies are doing and how about that Glenn Beck, huh? and is democracy a viable proposition and have you checked the price of bread lately and what are we going to do about Iran, Iraq, Afghanistan, Chile, Pakistan, the Blue Dogs, the Tea Baggers, the Republicans, the Democrats, the Libertarians, Joe Lieberman, unemployment, social security, hair loss, mass murderers, the abysmal education system, global warming, the sun being extinguished at some point, how meat is processed, and whether Fox News or any of the other news is really news, and who is having a baby by whom when, and so on, and so on, but all I can seem to write about is my/our relationship with our Source and the state of our consciousness.

I have been out of step with the rest of humankind as long as I can remember. My concerns are not other people's concerns.

If I could just make this final break with any concern at all with what the world conjures up, I would be gone, gone beyond, totally gone. "If ever the silver cord would break. . . ."

after midnight

2009-11-05T05:57:00.005-07:00

We build up what we build up. And we tear down what we tear down. What we build up in our lives takes prominence, and what we tear down goes to ruin.

We are the ones who do this and no one else. Who we are is what we have built up. And who we are is what we have torn down. This is no cause for lamentation or rejoicing. For we are where and who we are. And we even now build up what we build up and tear down what we tear down. We are shaping ourselves each moment.

And yet if we are trying to shape ourselves into something, we have not sense enough to know the shaping.

Contemplation is key here. Con-templum-ation. The templum is our capacity, vast open space in which we sit quietly and open and listen, no agenda of our own. It is in the realm of the templum that we let go of all we are, all we have made of ourselves and listen to the Word, our Source. ("In the beginning was the Word.") When we disappear, we can hear. We open with great room. We become the templum. the temple, the place and space of capacity and great understanding.

* * *
2:15 a.m.
Awoke with these words reverberating:
BEHOLD! I WILL NEVER LEAVE THEE NOR FORSAKE THEE.
My heart calm and open and knowing this eternal truth.

* * *
We can live now as if we have already dropped the body. It is a matter of identification. At our core is our Source, the Mystery which we cannot even begin to imagine. And yet is so familiar, so family-iar. Through quietness and calm and ever-increasing confidence (con-fidence: telling all, disclosing all, and listening to our Source's Disclosures), we identify with, become identical to the Source who is our core. We have already moved to "the other side," because "the other side" and "this side" are not different. This is not religion. This is direct experiential knowledge. We know as we are known.

early a. m. thoughts

2009-11-04T07:05:00.004-07:00

God is not anything you imagine, including your imagining that God does not exist. You cannot imagine God out of existence. Even your imagination that God is all in your imagination is your imagination. Your imagination, pro or con, has nothing to do with God.

Nor is God truth, beauty, and love. Once again, vain imaginings. We erect images of God or No-God and fall prey (fall down and pray?) to these images. In this way atheists and theists are much alike. Each grouping congratulates themselves on having the correct imaginings.

* * *
Do you know the difference between a mage and a sage?
I'll bite. What?
A mage knows nothing and doesn't like it.
A sage knows nothing and it's mighty fine.

* * *
Jesus said, A man made a big dinner and sent his servant buddy out to tell the invited guests that it was ready. The first one said, "I've got stuff to do." The second one said, "I've got stuff to do." Each of the rest on the invited guest list said, "I've got stuff to do."The servant came back and said "They aren't coming. They say they have stuff to do." The man said, okay, go out to the road and invite everyone you see. (From the Gospel of Thomas)

Here's that "stuff to do" thing again. The easy understanding of the story is that we don't stop to smell the roses. So we schedule "Rose-Smelling Time" in our planner. A perhaps more difficult understanding (because we don't want to hear it) of the story is that we allow no space because of the fear of facing ourselves, of being alone with ourselves. We must stay occupied at all times by invading troops.

We distract ourselves from all the shit we've piled up inside over the years. Or from the vast aching hole at our core that we know we can never fill. We really don't like ourselves but it's alright because we have "stuff to do." We live, what, 70 - 80 - 90 years? in a state of total distraction.

The story doesn't say that anyone ever came to the dinner. But I bet the people on the road did. No one on the road has any "stuff to do." When on the road, every moment is free and open. That dinner party is still going on.

cruise control

2009-11-03T09:29:00.008-07:00

I am convinced that a major reason that some do not understand what I am talking/writing about in this blog is because of not having the "relevant background knowledge" (see this seminal article by Sol Stern on E. D. Hirsch's approach to education).

I am writing from the perspective of and to those who already have background knowledge in the exploration of, and findings in, the study of human consciousness.

This basic background curriculum is based upon an insatiable appetite for understanding human thought processes through an avid reading of novels (American, European, Asian, African, South and Central American and from all cultures everywhere), the devouring and comprehension of the major thinkers (regardless of national or cultural origin, and the more "outside the box" the better) of psychology, philosophy, spirituality, religion, politics, sociology, anthropology, economics, communication, physics, poetry, alchemy, astrology, and so on. This must be supplemented by deep unafraid encounter with humans of all types, "classes," and understandings, ESPECIALLY if their belief systems and ways differ from your own. Learn how to weld and raise bees and fire guns and slaughter your own meat or vegetables (even beans scream when boiled or bitten). Stop aligning yourself with one encampment and ignoring or being against all others.

Acknowledge that you don't know zip and are constantly learning.

This may sound overwhelming but what else do you have to do? Jump on that same old pogo stick over and over? Surely you have perfected its every nuance by now.

Read Stern's article. Even if you decide to keep driving the same old consciousness vehicle you have been in for so long with its set cruise control and butt warmer, what the heck, you can drive while multi-tasking can't you?

ways we trap ourselves

2009-11-03T06:16:00.010-07:00

Rather than opening to boundlessness, we trap ourselves within our consciousness. Two major traps exist. Some fervently believe in realism and consider themselves realists, not like all the other fools. A realist, with the ardor of a Lourdes-visiting pilgrim who has laid aside all "crutches," fervently believes that only what the generally agreed upon set of physical senses (taste, touch, smell, sight, sound, etc) pick up is "real." All else is fantasy,

Two general types of realists exist: thinking and non-thinking. The non-thinking realist has thoughts but gives them little attention except insofar as they serve to gratify his/her physical "realistic" needs. The thinking realist gives more value to thoughts, including them as "sense data" for a "true" view of reality.

The thinking realist usually does not practice meta thought, the practice of stepping back from his thoughts for consideration and reflection. What he thinks and senses is real and not to be questioned. This is called ordinary consciousness. This consciousness state is one in which many live (without giving it a second thought).

The second consciousness state in which we trap ourselves is called enlightenment. We hypnotize ourselves with the reflected light of symbols and concepts we call holy: Jesus, Buddha, Allah, angels, nirvana, heaven. bliss, rapture, the Pope, Rumi, Benny Hinn, the cross, prosperity, progress, the Secret, and so on. Some of these listed you may see and pooh-pooh with delight. Others are your sacred cows and not to be messed with in any way (though you do like to milk them).

Whatever we cling to as holy is no longer holy.

The concept of enlightenment is one of the most dangerous known to man. You are what you are what you are what you are. To try to fashion yourself into what you are not is ridicule-ous. Diets don't work, not even spiritual ones.

Though I do not consider myself a christian (nor a buddhist nor any other ian or ist), I really like that Jesus dude. He was always blowing up people's consciousness states, speaking in paradoxes and koans (which are as clear as a bell if you are in the same consciousness state as the speaker, but make the mind go wanky if you are not). He even lamented from time to time that nobody knew what he was talking about. (And we still don't. But we did what we humans often do in our perpetual search for security -- we built a Savings & Loan institution on top of him.)

Here are some words of Jesus that might sum up what I am trying to say"

"His disciples asked him: When will you appear to us? When will we see you? Jesus replied, When you strip naked without shame and trample your clothing underfoot just as little children do, then you will look at the son of the living one without being afraid." Gospel of Thomas, 37.

Forget enlightenment. It's just some more shuck and jive about saving yourself, that sweet precious little kernel of individuality you cling to with such desperation.

Trample that clothing underfoot. Stomp both realism and enlightenment into the Ground. Go naked. Run free.

intellectual structures

2009-11-02T06:28:00.013-07:00

Our consciousness consists partially of an intellectual structure. One's intellectual structure is a web of relationships of concepts (emerging forms, abstractions, emotions) developed over one's lifetime to make sense of sensation.

Intellectual structures vary in complexity. Some are very simple with fewer concepts and differentiations, and the web of relations among the existing concepts may be habitually automatic in their pathways. Some intellectual structures may be thus almost entirely predictable with little creativity or newness of pathways -- some concepts always being in the forefront and connected by straight well-plowed furrows.

At the other extreme are intellectual structures ever-opening to new concepts, new routes of connectiveness amongst these and the other more-established concepts -- an intellectual structure that is alive and vibrant with new possibility and with adherence to and resonance with the supreme intellectual structure of life and Light itself.

Intellectual structures vary in sensitivity, openness, complexity, responsiveness, clarity, concreteness, awareness, vibrational quality and capability, inclusiveness, focus, range, speed, curiosity, and potency.

Some intellectual structures are more attuned to the rhythms of the universe, the cosmos, the Source. Others are more attuned to societal customs of humans. A balance between the two is a goodness, though I favor the former over the latter. The latter often excludes (or attempts to exclude) the former while the former always includes the latter.

what must i do?

2009-11-01T05:09:00.006-07:00

A recalibration is needed. A sharpening of focus. I have only this consciousness to effect change in the world. What are the transformations, the dedication needed? One person's consciousness counts much. More than all the guns, the bombs, the wealth of all the gold, precious metals, and paper currency amassed in one large pile.

This consciousness is all I have, all I am. I have only this consciousness to become the change, the transformation so needed in this world. First I must disregard all whines of protest against the values I know as true. I must trust my own consciousness, its spirit, its soul, its core. I must recognize that this consciousness I am walks and talks with God, my Source, my deep and intimate Friend. I must recognize and act upon the fact that "my" consciousness is fed by, springs into being from God's consciousness, that I and the Source are one, that I am not Him, but He is me.

The transformation happening on earth amongst humans now is like a great and ever-widening rift. Those on one side of the chasm are those who choose to stay in separative consciousness, who continue to live in an I-it world, where everything other than themselves is an it, devoid of soul and feeling, existing for one purpose only, the care and entertaining of themselves. That species of human is receding into antiquity and will die forever.

The earth now is birthing unitive consciousness. I see it in myself and speak for no one else -- an awareness of being at home in the universe. My heartbeat is the heartbeat of the cosmos. My breath, the universe breathing. My consciousness, planetary and cosmic consciousness. The earth is being reclaimed, restored, returned to the rightful place of kinship. Kinship with the vastness of all being. I see this. I know this. I am this.

What must you do? For you it is the same. You are a unique manifestation of the Source. The Source speaks as your heart mind. You know what you are to do. Honor your Teacher. Love and study the Teachings. Be a member of the vast Spiritual Community, both seen and unseen. Turn away from separative consciousness. It is a hellish fiend. If it is your individualism you are concerned about, unitive consciousness promotes, depends upon unique individuality and its full expression. Separative consciousness is a rubber stamp of hellish sameness.

A great transformation is happening. We are fortunate to be alive at this time. I will do all I can.

interlinkings

2009-10-31T12:00:00.004-07:00

There are forces at work in the transformation of life on this planet that make the efforts and travesties of governments, nations, countries and their panoply of bureaucrats, politicians, power brokers, archists and anarchists, great women, great men, the smug, arrogant, and greedy, develers and developers, entrepreneurs, shuckers and jivers, philanthopists, religious groups, terrorists, terra-ists, neo-hippies, the sleek, the slick, and the workers of legerdemain seem blustery, naive, self-serving, and of little consequence. We can't even feed the hungry, for earth's sake!

I am not advocating that this turmoil of action and inaction cease. We will keep on doing and not doing in both admirable and despicable ways.

I simply point to the understanding that as relative newcomers to this Grand Adventure (4000 or 15 billion years or so, depending on your metaphorical frame, either one being a mere bubble on the surface of the boundless ocean of being), we have no idea of what is going on, no program agenda, except that catastrophe always seems to follow resurrection (or is that the other way around?), but do seem to have settled on one agreement, which so far I have yet to see on a bumper sticker: SAVE OUR BUTTS! We are finding out the hard way that our butts are interlinked (now there's some graphic imagery) and with all the other butts of the visible and invisible universe.

I don't know that our system of shrivel-ization based on money, private property, the divine rights of landed gentry, and the accelerated threat of force and violence is going to be able to handle all this.Something new has to be born.

the revaluing of meaning

2009-10-31T05:46:00.007-07:00

If you were talking with a theoretical physicist, you may not expect to understand his language completely or maybe even partially, unless you were also schooled in that language. You would no doubt comprehend, however, that he was describing the universe (reality) as accurately as he could, and would make modifications in his language and theory as required and needed.

The same is true for a theoretical theist, who unlike the phys-icist is not looking to describe the physical world, but the realm of the theos, or meta-physics (that which goes beyond and underlies physics).

These days physics is regarded by many as the supreme language of description, partially because of its practical product-ion (hubble telescope, a better can-opener, the ability to bomb the moon, etc.) and partially because it requires no reflection on meaning.

Theoretical theism, or metaphysics, has been relegated to the trash heap of scorn by some because meaning has been devalued, constricted into the physical realm only (the meaningfulness of sustaining a 4 hour erection, the ability to tweet at will, the satisfaction of castigating one's opponents, demeaning thus taking the place of meaning).

Theoretical theism, or metaphysics, focuses precisely on questions of meaning. What is the Ground of existence? What is the supreme value? What is life? Who is asking these questions? Can one step out of duality and its oppositional behavior? What does it mean to step out of linear time and live in the eternal now? Is the Source approachable? Is there a hierarchy of beings of which we are a part? Is the universe alive and conscious, self-aware? What is this energy called love?

I appreciate the irony of the word theoretical. "Retical" refers to rhetoric, the expounding of ideas. "Theo" has connotations of theos, of God. So theoretical physics, amusingly, means the expounding of ideas of God, in the physical realm. O shudder! O horror! I can see the supportive pillars of materialistic science looking to stand alone in non-theistic splendor, begin to crack and tremble and fall -- fall into the supportive arms of its true partner -- metaphysics and physics entwined forever in conjugal bliss.

"the waters saw thee, O God"

2009-10-30T07:30:00.006-07:00

A couple of scriptures, the second of which may not be too familiar.

"And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters." Genesis 1:2

"The waters saw thee, O God, the waters saw thee; they were afraid: the depths also were troubled." Psalm 77:16

Deep dark water. No form yet born. Only voidness, emptiness --empty of every thing. In all directions.

Imagine you, your consciousness, rudimentary awareness, simplistic dark consciousness, alone. Consciousness both dark and deep. Unfathomable.

All of a sudden, shaking you to your depths, fear springs through the cold dark icy stillness of your core. Something moved, moved across what you now know to be your face.

Something powerful and on the move. Something so dark that by comparison your darkness was light. And you saw It. And It saw you. And you were afraid -- an electric thrill of fear moving through you, illuminating your depths with Its darkness. And you recognized It though never having seen It before.

The Spirit of God.

It moved upon your face. And you were never the same again.

Because It had a face, you had a face. A reflection of the Spirit of God forevermore. Fear vanished. Love appeared.

foot fetish

2009-10-29T05:40:00.005-07:00

This sliced and reconstructed foot has been a blessing. Non-weight-bearing, it has been calling the shots, defoliating the peacock plumage of my magnificence and revealing the subservience of the plucked chicken underneath. I go where it wants to go (primarily nowhere) and at its pace -- a slow lurching forward of the walker with definite rest stops required. (Those ads for Geezer Scooters are starting to have appeal.) My butt is getting wider (extended sitting) and more muscular (skootching on its cheekiness up and down stairs); my shoulders and arms becoming hewn oak.

Today is the day though. My foot will breathe air once again and I will get to see its new format. Maybe then a boot will be affixed for weight-bearing maneuvers with crutches and maybe even a cane (I have several ready for road testing) and some skipping and cavorting!

The plucked chicken may grow new plumage yet!

"no, no, no, that ain't me, babe"

2009-10-29T05:13:00.004-07:00

To live not being suckered in by the world's continuous insistence (through addresses of all kinds -- phone calls, conversations, mail, etc. --external addresses, and internal addresses, "me" addressing "me") that I am a certain way and no other; to not be sucked in by the calls to existence of "me" as a certain individual with these responses and these reactions; the one for whom an obituary has already been written; the one whose life is set upon an irrevocable trajectory. To not allow that preordained daily coloring within the lines and within the lines only of a caricature of my true existence. To not succumb to that death. May as well put it on fast forward and get it over with.

Living such a "life" puts me furtherest from God. And God it is I aim to know ever more deeply, to give up all robotic endeavor and be the open suffering sensitivity (the two are the same), the ever expanding capaciousness filled only by my Maker who started this journey with me, produced me as a subset of his boundlessness, is with me, and shall always be -- heart of my heart, soul of my soul.

Amen, Selah, and Yes Indeed!

night check

2009-10-28T07:44:00.002-07:00

2:37 a.m.
I awoke and looked at my theological underpinnings to see if any were shaky. Didn't want any collapsing on me during the night. They weren't. I only have one anyway -- knowledge, direct knowledge of God. All else (love, trust, faith, service etc.) are based on that one.

I really don't have a leg to stand on. I rest in knowledge, ever-increasing knowledge of God. Detachment is key here. As long as I am attached, I know nothing.

i don't just give up, i give in

2009-10-28T07:17:00.005-07:00

[Note: all my dear friends who freak over theological language, substitute X or The Great Pumpkin or the Mystery or That-Which-Can-Never-Be-Named or the designation of your choice. "God" is fine with me and "God" I shall use.]

No matter what I do, God stays the same. There is something comforting about that. I am the one who has to become different. I can't get away with all my shit. God is not going to meet me halfway here and become more shitty just so I can feel better. I wouldn't anyway. I would just say what kind of God is that, that gets all weirded out just so I don't feel so alone in my weirded-out-ness?

No matter what I do, God stays the same. If I go off on a rampage, drinking and whoring and transgressing all social and moral bounds, God stays the same. If I get all holy and churchy or synagogy and boy scouty, God stays the same.

Some might ask, where's my incentive? I ask right back, what are you trying to do, make an impression on God? Give me a break. Try that trick on someone who will change when you do. It's called manipulation.

So now what? No matter what I do, God stays the same. It's a blessed relief, really. Can't get away with any of my tricks. And I've got a bag full of some highly inventive ones in which I have great pride -- some of them so tricky I don't know until much much later that I was being so tricky. All to no avail. God just stays the same.

So I wind up just hanging around with God. He doesn't seem to mind. We walk together, sit together, laugh and cry together. And no matter what he does, I just stay the same.

Notes To Myself

2009-10-27T07:28:00.007-07:00

In changing the name of this blog from Embodying Spirit, I am acknowledging that I am writing (especially lately since I have been "laid up" with this healing foot) "Notes to Myself." Looks as if I am engaged in some sort of post-post-post-doc studies of my own devising (there's no school out there that I know of that teaches what I wish to and am learning, and I probably wouldn't go to it even if there was). So I'll post my notes to myself as I dive and delve into the practical realities and principles of this Mystery which we bemoan and wail and rejoice in and puzzle over and often look to escape and avoid. No avoidance here though. Too far along on the path for such shenanigans.

You can chime in with comments anytime you want but as Chief Dan George said in The Outlaw Josey Wales "I shall endeavor to persevere."

Recent notes:

Inversion -- That this world which we so tout and fret over and give priority to is a econdary world, a shadow world we continue to make up, co-create, fall on our knees and worship -- a mass hypnosis worthy of Jim Jones. Inversion means this second-order reality is given top priority. Prime reality is regarded as non-existent or of no consequence.

Only that which our sciences (which view the universe through a constricted limited lens producing a contracted awareness) hold to be real is real. Science and a-theism are our newest religions. Contracted awareness is our "enlightenment." We have thrown out both the baby and the bathwater, but by Jove (wups, not supposed to mention gods), the pan we are left holding is of the latest technological design!

Being nobody is natural and fine -- In the eyes of "the world" (human-created society) we are supposed to be something, a somebody, to amount to something. In our heart-of-hearts, we know we are nothing. All that we are is given to us by uncreated grace. Beyond what we are given, in being called into existence, we are nothing. We are fine until we fall out of graciousness and begin looking at ourselves through the imagined eyes of "the world." It is then we suffer our (self-inflicted) doubts and fears and waverings and uncertainties. We have relinquished control of our lives to a fantasy. I am done with all that and have been for quite some time. I look through my own eyes, which are the same eyes as the graciousness that births us all.

Divine knowledge -- There is no room for anti-intellectualism in the discerning of Divine Knowledge (the knowledge and wisdom of primary reality). Fear or scorn of hard-to-grasp concepts keeps one intellectually stunted. Dictionaries, Google, encyclopedias, friends exist for good reason. If a person figures that because they can't understand something, then it is not worth knowing, that is the height of laziness. "Knock and knock and knock and the door shall be opened." Of course, a person may have more important things to do, like file their fingernails.

Conversing -- I must use ordinary logic to speak of the non-ordinary. I must use the language of the IHOP menu to order the Sublime.

Corpse-dragging -- If one does not have the will to know, does not have even simple curiosity enough to query, to question, to look into things, one is already dead and is just dragging one's corpse through the same old structures and strictures that one settled for long ago, just taking up space on the planet until finally found and buried.

Solitary bird -- Think of a solitary bird flying high. This bird is detached intellect. Not hampered by making a name for itself, by how it looks in others' eyes. Not weighed down or distracted by appetite (desires fleetingly fulfilled). Unencumbered by the bonds and chains of security seeking. Unconcerned with bodily woes. The bird, detached from all anchors, detached and with strong will to know, this will being its energetic propulsion, soars higher, breaking through all clouds of unknownness into the sunlight of Isness, the bright clarity of the Divine Intellect, the all-inclusive knowing, no bounds, from which it sprang, in which it resides, and in which it always Is.

skootch-hop-skootch liberation

2009-10-26T09:21:00.007-07:00

Back home after a couple of days in Phoenix for foot surgery. Cast on foot puffy-amplitude-worthy of Pillsbury Doughboy. All going well.

Skootched up stairs on my butt to get to computer for this posting.

Here is a journal entry from this a.m. --

(2:30 a.m.) Propped in my futon sofa bed, gargantuan bandage wrap around the bone-chiseled, bone-broken, re-set with internal pins, left foot lifted in air on pillows somewhere in the altitudinal proximity of my heart, body bent in U, I sip black coffee as pain pill chaser and read dense theological tomes of Meister Eckhart, who makes more sense to me these days than any other writer-thinker, underlining and exclamation marking and marginal noting with brief setting aside of book for aha! reverberations in consciousness.

Blessed! Truly blessed to be knocked flat on my back for greater revelations, deeper contmeplations. God is good. My friend, Mr. Walker, stands by with its ever-open invitation to move to fresh surrounds, kitchen, bathroom, living room. Skootch-hop-skootch liberation.

But it's the overall aspects that thrill. Enforced hermitage! What more could a man want?

2009-10-21T02:02:00.000-07:00

knowing as you are known

2009-10-20T01:01:00.017-07:00

"Where individuality ends, there God begins. God wants nothing more of you than for you to go out of yourself and all individuality and let God be God within. The most insignificant individual structure that takes form in you is as big as God. How is that? It completely obstructs God. Once the structure appears, God and all his Godhead disappear. Once the structure is transcended, God enters. . . He reveals himself in the soul in boundless wisdom, which is himself. . . " -- Meister Eckhart

Consider yourself as consciousness, as awareness. Open to your being as consciousness in process, changeable, ever-changing.

Consider that you have choice and that you choose what fills your consciousness -- now this, now that, now the other. As your attention shifts from here to there, and there to here, the consciousness that is you is transformed.

When you both will and allow yourself to be still, when you allow your attention to rest on one thing and one thing only, one simple focus (a flower, a cloud, a tree, a word, a sound), the consciousness that is you becomes clear and still and open.

This quiet stillness, this quiescence is as far as many meditative practices go. Our detached and unlimited will to know allows going further. When we drop all identification, knowledge and wisdom are revealed. We know and we are known.

We disappear. Only God, only the Godhead remains. This is grace, the grace of the One who breathes us. Unlimited comprehension opens.

tsunami

2009-10-18T00:37:00.018-07:00

Human society, this world, is based upon separation and divisiveness. Our society, our science, our religions, our daily life in their current forms are based upon, could not exist without this mental habit of chopping reality into pieces and bits.

So long as we succumb to this largely unconscious, habitual way of thinking, we will be at war within ourselves, with each other, and with "nature." Competition, war, backbiting, plotting, scheming, force, opposition, foot-dragging, hatreds, stridency will always be our way of "life."

Moving out of this mistaken view is our only hope for societal transformation. A tsunami of consciousness change is required, a change that once effected will cause us to see the sheer arrogance and nightmarish horror of separateness and division in which we once lived, and wonder how we could have been so blind.

We are not separate. We all call each other into existence. We must be careful what we are calling.

A tsunami begins with one small shudder within the existing order.

The existing order of human society resides within my and your consciousness.

2009-10-13T08:00:00.001-07:00

Off the grid for a while.

will and wisdom

2009-10-13T02:11:00.019-07:00

"No one is so foolish as not to desire wisdom, yet why do so many remain ignorant?" asked Eckhart. Because, first, they forsake their unlimited and detached will to know and think instead that reality is something to behold. -- C. F. Kelley

We ditch our will to know the Ultimate, divert will's waters into the irrigation of our irritations and their soothings, flood our plains of stupor with tepid motionless waters.

We forsake our precious unlimited will to know and hang around beholding life, waiting to die, forgetting that in doing so we are already dead.

We are ignore-ant because we give up, surrendering our will to superficial blatherings, watching our life go by as just another reality show.

Meister Eckhart (1260 - 1328) was so far ahead of the generally accepted learning curve that we are still catching up with him. He incorporated all the major thinkings on earth at that time and came to this conclusion: if we keep knocking on heaven's door, it will open. But not unless we knock and keep on knocking.

If we want wisdom (instead of mere knowledge), we must use our "unlimited and detached will to know." We possess, we are given, we are unlimited will. And it takes unlimited will to pursue and open to wisdom. We've got what it takes.

But in opening to wisdom, our will must be detached -- not attached, no clinging, no velcro-brain. How can we be filled unless we stay empty?

Second, wisdom cannot be acquired without disciplined intellection sustained by divine grace.

"Oh God! Does that mean I have to think!? This will thing sounded okay, but this is starting to sound like work (shudder). How come the universe can't just pop my head open and pour some wisdom in? And discipline! Don't even begin to speak to me of discipline!"

Discipline means to become a disciple, a follower of wisdom. It doesn't mean wearing a hair shirt or flogging oneself with brain-cracking whips. Disciplined intellection means to turn one's attention to higher and deeper understandings and to keep it there, unwavering. To open our heartminds to that which breathes us, sustains us, gives us life.

This is where the Overdrive kicks in. When we knock with unlimited and detached will to know, the Door opens. And keeps opening. I find this astounding. We are born to open to wisdom. And the Universe is in our favor.

those who leap and those who do not

2009-10-12T06:29:00.012-07:00

"American DNA is a notoriously complex recipe for creating a body politic, but two strands in particular have always stood out in high contrast: the risk-averse Puritan work ethic and the entrepreneur's urge to seize the main chance. Proponents of neither m.o. like to credit the other with anything positive; huggers of the shore tend not to praise explorers, while gamblers remain unimpressed by those who husband savings accounts. Yet blended in much the same way that parents' genes are in their children, the two ways of operating have made us who we are as a country.

That's not just a metaphor, either. Geneticists have shown that there is literally such a thing as American DNA, not surprising when nearly all of us are descended from immigrants. We therefore carry an immigrant-specific genotype, a genetic marker expressing itself—in some environments, at least—as energetic risk-taking and competitive self-promotion. Even when famine, warfare, or another calamity strikes, most people stay in their homeland. The self-selecting group that migrates, seldom more than 2 percent, is disproportionally inclined to take chances. They also have above-average intelligence and are quicker decision makers. Something about their dopamine-receptor systems, the neural pathway associated with a taste for novelty and risk, sets them apart from those who stay put." -- James McManus, What Poker Can Teach Us

I wonder if these differences are also true of the "huggers of the shore" and the "explorers" within America, of "those who leap" and those who do not, whether the leap be geographical, mental, social, or spiritual. Some seem to remain content with the same old ideas, same old society, same old spirituality, same old geographical placement. Others will not stand still for such.

I recommend reading the entire article. Each of us "plays poker" with our lives whether we think of it that way or no.

is you is or is you ain't my baby

2009-10-12T00:55:00.005-07:00

Now I know you have far more important things to think about than your own consciousness, but stay with me for a moment here. How can you actualize your potentiality? I do not mean how can you produce more widjits. Nor am I speaking of taking educational courses or attending an endless series of Zam-Bam-Wowie Seminars.

Your consciousness is one of a few billion human consciousnesses on the planet. Then there are the zillions of non-human consciousnesses (those we label and dismiss as animals, plants, insects, etc.). And the multi-zillions of trans-human consciousnesses of those who have gone before us and continue going on.

Never mind those. You really have trouble in believing in them anyway. You only have eyes for you. So I ask again. How can and do you actualize your consciousness potential?

We 21st century humans divide the world automatically and un-conscious-ly into subject (that would be you), object (everything you perceive as not you), and verb (what you do to and with all the objects and what you perceive all the objects do to and with you).

Take a leap for a moment. What is the greatest verb? The greatest verb is is. Without is, there are no other verbs.

To actualize the potentiality of your consciousness, of the consciousness that you are, drop the subject (I, I, I), cease object-ing (turning all not perceived as you into objects, even if they are objects of your affection), and open to Is. (Bucky Fuller said it long ago, with his "I seem to be a verb.")

Thomas Aquinas nailed it too, with his "no potentiality is actualized save by that which is in act." And the Zen dudes and dudesses certainly agree with that.

No subject. No object. Only the Great Verb. Is.

The thick hull of separative consciousness so carefully nurtured as protection but which imprisons breaks open. All potential stirs with great release.

Here is the exciting part. I'll state it baldly. Our consciousness opens to God's consciousness. Our consciousness is a subset of God's consciousness (and I speak not here of some white-bearded floater in the sky). The is we are extends into Is. And Is is all the is there is. Unlimited potential here. This is the journey we are on.

meself in the wee hours

2009-10-11T02:34:00.019-07:00

"Erudition, no matter how scientific or comprehensive, is at best only ancillary to the direct knowledge gained by detached intellection." C.F.Kelley

"When the mind is happy, the whole universe is happy."
Seung Sahn

Click into here for eventual delightful closeup:

Illustration by Gustav Dore, A Wild Ride

subjecting ourselves to objection

2009-10-10T01:33:00.011-07:00

When living in the Energetic Mode, living as Energy, as the LifeForce that we are, we live as pure Awareness, and not as "objects" of awareness that we cling to. The objects are the sites of our objection. We object to the free flow of Awareness. We settle.

We settle Awareness into one or a few "spots." We "object" if these spots are not re-cognized by "others," who also have their favorite spots upon which Awareness stops. Pit-stops of consciousness which become holy shrines.

This stopping of Awareness is perhaps more easily seen in the phenomenon described as getting "stuck" on someone. Awareness is no longer free-flowing, but continues to return to the "object" of one's affections. One thinks one cannot live without what one is stuck on. Hypnosis. Self-hypnosis. Puppy love.

Don't laugh. You are probably doing the same. You have your favorite pit-stops of Awareness, your ideas dipped in bronze dangling from your consciousness's rear-view mirror for your perpetual contemplation and satisfaction (which you will defend with zeal if you sense scorn). You object. You "object."

When living as Energy, as the continuous unfolding of the LifeForce, we do not "object" nor do we "subject" everything to our "selves." All action is the action of the LifeForce that we are.

What is called "normal" on earth today is a consciousness that is pitted with stops and clings and stucknesses. Pure Awareness is considered, if at all, as not possible.

And yet, in our finest moments, we humans are pure Awareness.

the moon agrees

2009-10-09T00:01:00.011-07:00

Having naturally and with little effort removed myself from the societal onrush of the generational hordes behind, all pushing for their rightful place on the planet, giving them room as all the elders are expected to do, becoming a balding grizzled repository of cultural, theosophical, and other peculiar knowledges no longer in fashion, I sit perched on the side of this slumbering volcano which long ago blew maybe a mile off its elevation thereby producing several peaks named after the relatives and by the whimsy of the dominant by god members of the domineering society on a first name basis with the map makers and the politicians who continuously seem to have little idea of what to do but funnel more power to the powerful, I stare out the window at the moon and laugh.

This left hoof will be hacked by a chopper with the right credentials, experience, and bedside manner in a couple of weeks, so I done got me (past perfect tense, self-obtaining, for all you grammarians) a cell phone capable of twitting and tweetering and texting and no doubt many other things I will never comprehend for when I have "tears in my ears from lying on my back in my bed," as the old song goes, thus finally dipping my toe into the baptismal waters of the twenty-first century, becoming a communication monster.

Thanks to all who take a peek at this blog. My posts should get really interesting when I am strung out on some whammo pain medication. Though I no doubt will appreciate the soporifics, I still think that, as always, laughter will be the best medicine. The moon agrees.

one is not supposed to speak of these things aloud

2009-10-08T01:40:00.010-07:00

One is not supposed to speak of these things aloud. Too easily misunderstood. Folk have been killed, and perhaps even worse, set on a pedestal (a slower form of death). But how is transformation in human consciousness to occur without pointing to the existence and nature of the transformations?

I speak in words that make sense to me, that describe the consciousness that I am as clearly and succinctly as possible:

I am the Lifeforce (Spirit) opening into and as the densest of matter. I am an invasion, an infusion. I feel and see and know and am the vast infinity of Spirit, opening into, as, and out of dense matter, this physical world here. I am a merge and an emerging. I am an outbreathing of Spirit into the realm of and as Man. I am complete subjectivity with no object. I am an embodying of Spirit.

This is my conscious awareness. This is my experience. This is who and what I am.

mage-ician

2009-10-07T01:49:00.015-07:00

I call a world into existence with each thought.

Each thought is followed by another thought so rapidly
that this world I continue calling into existence
appears to have continuity.

A rapid succession of depressing thoughts creates a depressing world.
A rapid succession of happy thoughts creates a happy world.
Both are conjurings of thought.

Thoughts are habit-forming.
I create the same world over and over.
I wear this world like a habit.

When I open beyond thought, without thought,
I am neither this nor that.

creating a head on top of your head

2009-10-07T01:00:00.005-07:00

Some look to "getting rid of the ego." When attention is focused on "an ego to be rid of," one creates "an ego to be rid of." One is creating what one wishes to annihilate.

The popular conception is that one is doing this in order to be "enlightened," that "getting rid of the ego" is necessary to be "enlightened." Now one is in double trouble.

When attention is focused on being "enlightened," one creates some anticipated state of consciousness out there somewhere in the "future," wherever that is. One is now creating "an ego to be rid of" and an "enlightenment to become" and a "future." No wonder Zen masters hit people in the head!

bhagavad gita

2009-10-06T07:00:00.005-07:00

I am giving an ongoing recounting and commentary at the Warrior Notes blog site of one of the greatest warrior stories ever told, the story of Arjuna in the Bhagavad Gita. All are invited to tune in.

memo to myself

2009-10-06T01:10:00.012-07:00

Keep opening to this! --

He sees in the darkest dark, hears where there is no sound. In the midst of darkness, he alone sees the dawn; in the midst of the soundless, he alone hears harmony. Therefore, in depth piled upon depth he can spy out the thing; in spirituality piled upon spirituality he can discover the essence. So in his dealings with the ten thousand things he supplies all their wants out of total nothingness. -- Chuang Tzu

I see the dawn in the darkest dark.
I hear harmony where there is no sound.
I see the essence no matter the depth
and cleverness of the obfuscations.
I deal effectively and well
with the ten thousand things
by being as nothing.
I do this by giving myself totally
to the Way and its Virtue.

the birthing of humanity

2009-10-05T02:08:00.025-07:00

Wittgenstein said, "Whereof one cannot speak, thereof one must be silent." But whereof one can speak, one must speak.

Here is what I must speak:

Humans are moving into a higher consciousness, a wider and deeper Awareness. Do not keep looking at the daily news of murderous and stuporous insensitivity. That is the old consciousness. Humanity is on the move. A birthing is happening. The pressures of the womb, the womb of humanity, are increasing. We cannot stay in the foetal position to which we have become accustomed. It is time to be born. We are at the beginning of a consciousness change of humanity -- opening to the nondual rather than the dual is its longterm action.

unbuckle your seat belts, we are in for a ride!

2009-10-04T02:35:00.010-07:00

We are moving into, are already in the beginning of a new era, the Era of Synthronicity, where every one and every thing are sitting on each other's lap simultaneously.

The old way, the Era of Materialism, has already blown apart. Both communism and capitalism, its two major ideologies or operating systems, have failed. The globalization that is occurring via communication is transcending those dinosauric power bases.

The old way is dying, is unsustainable.

We are moving into an era maximized by fluid grace, where all interacts with all. The rigid and the domineering will not make it. We are becoming synthronous, where we all (human and non-human, all life forms) are sitting on each other's laps simultaneously.

We have never faced this before. There is no map, only the journey. So center within your breathing and your open heart, unbuckle your seat belt, and don't hang on. Transformation is here!

deeming and re-deeming

2009-10-03T02:04:00.007-07:00

The topic of redemption arose yesterday, briefly, a couple of times. I let it ponder itself in my heartmind this morning.

We often look to redeem ourselves. In our own eyes and in the eyes of others. A natural human inclination, redemption means I turn in my old self for a new. I become as new.

There are some tricks for doing this. One is I lift myself up above others or out away from others into a special domain. I justify myself. Another is to go the other way, looking to redeem myself by seeing myself as a worm or as dirt. I punish myself. Neither of these work very well or for long. They are tricks I play.

What is true redemption? A clue is found in the word "redeem" itself. I have deemed myself as one way. Now I look to re-deem myself, to deem myself differently, as better, as more whole.

When we go a little deeper into demption, we find that the entire redemption saga comes about by deeming ourselves (as something) in the first place.

The Perfection of Wisdom says it well:
Just so the fool who has admitted into himself the notions of I and Mine
Is forced by that quite unreal notion of an I to undergo birth and death again and again.

Redemption means to be born again, anew. But if it is the I that is redeemed, to die again is certainly to follow. In this life now. One's self washer is stuck on an eternal redemption cycle.

True redemption is to stop deeming. No longer deeming myself as anything, not even deeming myself as nothing, simply giving up this whole deeming of me I do, I am redeemed and never need to deem again.

dream time

2009-10-02T01:24:00.021-07:00

All persons in a dream are me. All objects in a dream are me. All emotions in a dream are my emotions. All thoughts in a dream are my thoughts. All judgments in a dream are my judgments. All things done to me in a dream I am doing to myself. All things I do to others in a dream I am doing to myself.

The same is true for the dream we call awake.

The only way I know someone is through characteristics of my own. If I do not have certain characteristics, then neither does the world. I cannot see other than what I am.

To ject means to throw, to hurl. This dream is one large projection, one large subjection, one large objection, one large dejection, one large rejection, one large injection, one large conjecture. I deliberately eject myself from my abjection, assume a different trajectory. I belong to the ject set, the ject sect.

What is love but one large hurling of the heart?

I create my dream dream and play every part. I create my awake dream and am it all. What I see is what I ject.

I have prejudice against the dream dream as not real,
prejudice in favor of the awake dream as real.

I can awaken from the dream dream.
Can I awaken from the awake dream?

interwhirling

2009-10-01T05:31:00.007-07:00

We are made in the image of the God whose image we are making.

This is what the Buddhists call dependent co-arising.

With everything mutually, dependently co-arising, we are bigger than the little pinpoint we make of ourselves. We are as large as the Cosmos. Our awareness continues expanding to real - eyes this.

attention attention attention

2009-10-01T01:00:00.007-07:00

Whatever we attend to, we become.

When we realize that, truly know that to be real, rather than in our mind saying yeah yeah, and moving on to forage in other gardens, when we realize that whatever we attend to, we become, when we know this to be true, then we have found a simple tool of transformation -- our attention. It is right before our eyes, behind our eyes, and with our eyes -- our physical eyes and our spiritual eye.

Though it is a simple tool (whatever we point it to, it goes there), if the one who holds it is unsteady, it will point all over the place. This is why meditation and prayer and mindful awareness are such excellent practices.

Sometimes our tool of attention drops from our hands and we live in a fog. Sometimes we point it at ourselves, stare into its laser eye, and are blinded. Sometimes our slurpy desires get hold of it and point it toward search of satisfaction. Sometimes we point it at others and get all judgy.

Whatever we attend to we become.

My practice is to attend to the Buddha field, to Christ consciousness, to the Source of Wisdom by whatever name. Sometimes my attention wavers and I fall out of my practice. But I remember the Samurai saying: Seven times down, eight times up!

Whatever I attend to, I become.

black jaguar energy

2009-09-30T05:19:00.017-07:00

Calm, relentless, fierce,
unwavering, imperturbable, immovable,
alert, aware, playful

dakota war, inner war, memory of the land

2009-09-29T08:06:00.002-07:00

More than worthy of a read --

History Is A Nightmare From Which
I Am Trying To Awake

cling on

2009-09-29T00:12:00.007-07:00

We humans cling to what we can see through our extremely limited sense-perception, that flickering struck match in a room with no walls or floor or ceiling.

We cling to our thoughts like persons clinging to a toothpick in an ocean, like persons clinging to bubbles forever bursting.

We cling to each other.

We look to develop a basis for existing, a base, a ground on which to stand. We put our trust in this, in that -- some image of salvation. A salvation that will save us without us undergoing change.

We are so clever. We even invent no salvation as our salvation.

A cloud in the sky has no floor. A bird in flight is only motion.

When we are the universe, we need no shoe horn.

soul and body healing

2009-09-28T17:08:00.004-07:00

I have had pain in both hips for several weeks. Unceasing, and sometimes severe enough that I had to grit my teeth to keep from making noise. I was up between midnight and four a. m. last night, reading The Perfection of Wisdom, my consciousness opening in new understandings and wider, deeper realms. I went to bed, still in pain.

I had a dream which I will not go into, for fear it will not be understood by some, perhaps ridiculed. The sacred must remain sacred. It was a powerful dream in which I met some beings, one in particular, and went through great transformation. I awoke about 5:30 a. m. and began what is usually a torturous process of getting out of bed, standing, and walking across the room. There was no pain, absolutely none. It is now almost 5: 30 p.m. and still no pain. It has disappeared.

we have joy

2009-09-28T01:34:00.004-07:00

Even though we suffer and are in the midst of suffering,
we have joy as we open to the loving splendor
of being at home in the universe,
an integral part of the Boundless,
of the energizing radiance of the Buddha-fields,
of the radiant awareness of Christ-consciousness,
of the eternal opening of Wisdom in all its realms.

pre-requisite as cosmic student

2009-09-27T01:58:00.005-07:00

Jesus said some pretty tough words at times. He pulled no punches as a spiritual teacher, as a representative of the Cosmos, as a son of the Most High. Check this out (Luke 14: 25-33).

And there went great multitudes with him: and he turned, and said unto them, If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple.

A disciple is a student, a studier and close observer of the ways of the teacher, the master of the discipline. Jesus is the Master of being a human representative of the Source sourcing. If you wanted to be a citizen of the Cosmos, you came and studied with him. This is still the case.

About this hating stuff, we know that Jesus did not teach hate. What does this mean? There is an old Southern saying: Whole hog or none at all. The Marines say: Gung Ho! Over the top. Total commitment. Nothing held back. The old Zen dudes say: A hair's breadth of difference and you are totally lost. Others have echoed the sentiment: A miss is as good as a mile. One must turn totally away from preoccupation with self and others. We are talking loving detachment here.

This is what Jesus says next: And whosoever doth not bear his cross, and come after me, cannot be my disciple.

Mr. Buddha said life is suffering. We all know how right that is. That is the cross Jesus is talking about. Bear your suffering and come on, hit the road. What road? The road of awareness. The same awareness Jesus had.

Jesus then gives some examples that made sense to the folk of the day. Of course he did not talk in King James English.
For which of you, intending to build a tower, sitteth not down first, and counteth the cost, whether he have sufficient to finish it? Lest haply, after he hath laid the foundation, and is not able to finish it, all that behold it begin to mock him, Saying, This man began to build, and was not able to finish. Or what king, going to make war against another king, sitteth not down first, and consulteth whether he be able with ten thousand to meet him that cometh against him with twenty thousand? Or else, while the other is yet a great way off, he sendeth an ambassage, and desireth conditions of peace.

He says that if you are going to do something, like building a building or making a war (two ongoing preoccupations of humans, it seems), you better have the full capability of carrying it out.

In this case (becoming a Cosmic citizen), full capability is full capacity. Capaciousness. Room. Your teacup won't hold any Cosmic tea if it is already full of junque.

Then he returns to his theme, his opening remarks, and delivers the punch line: So likewise, whosoever he be of you that forsaketh not all that he hath, he cannot be my disciple.

To be a citizen of the Cosmos, a springing of the Wellspring, a child of the Great Mystery we call by many names, and to be a student as to how to do this, one has to give up everything. This doesn't mean you have to go to a hermitage. It means no attachment, no clinging. Fully in the world, but not of the world.

Not of the world, but of the Cosmos. Not of human society, but of the Wellspring.

This is a continuous practice. Whether one calls it detachment, hating, or no clinging, it is the same. These days I call it forgiving. Forsaking all the resentment I have gathered. Forgiving the world. Forgiving others. Forgiving myself. Releasing. Letting go.

Now I am ready to learn something.

awareness mind and ordinary mind

2009-09-26T00:19:00.005-07:00

Some years ago, as I sat and watched my thoughts, they seemed like a fast moving freight train. I eventually began to notice the spaces between the train "cars," the spaces between thoughts.

As I continued in this daily practice of just sitting and watching my thoughts (in the pre-dawn hours before my busy life), the space between thoughts became more clearly discernible. My awareness dwelled there rather than being carried away by the train.

I began to see that each thought arose independently. The "cars" were not connected to each other. Neither was there a "track" on which they ran. No track except what I created -- some part of me insisting I keep track. (Lest I disappear, I suppose.)

Ordinary mind is carried away by the train of thought. Identifies with (becomes identical to) the thought train. Awareness mind is simply here. No train exists. Thoughts arise. Disappear. No track except what is purposely created.

Thoughts bubble up (from somewhere -- a mystery) one at a time. Ordinary mind automatically merges these discrete and separate thoughts, creates mega thoughts ("how could they do this to me," etc.), creates monstrous and fantastic stories, sits there wearing its virtual reality helmet and gooning itself to stressful death.

Awareness mind simply notices. Does not try to stitch thoughts into a story. Awareness mind opens further -- smells smells, tastes tastes, hears sounds, thinks thinkings, feels feelings -- all the while releasing, letting go, ever opening fresh and anew.

Paradoxically, awareness mind can out think ordinary mind. Ordinary mind is stuck on a track. Awareness mind has no bounds. The boundless runs circles around the bound.

Heart Breathing

2009-09-25T02:29:00.008-07:00

When one sits quietly, one becomes mindful.
Mindful of breathing. Mindful of thoughts.
Mindful of feelings and emotion.

At some point, one is just sitting.
Awake. Aware.

One's "self" has disappeared.
One's heart is wide open.
All falls away. Forgiving. Releasing.

A gentle smile appears.

This is prayer. This is praying.
When the "inside" and the "outside" become as one.

Breathe in the loving energies
of the Breath that breathes you.
Breathe out the Love to all around you.

When breathing in, the heart relaxes, expands, opens.
When breathing out from the heart, the heart smiles.

Breathing in, heart relaxing.
Breathing out, heart smiling.

Breathing in, heart opening.
Breathing out, heart smiling.

Calm gentle breathing.
Heart breathing.

life after the first death

2009-09-24T04:50:00.007-07:00

"He who is victorious cannot be harmed by the second death." Revelations 2:11

What is the first death? Understanding the first death is key to understanding this passage in Revelations which John said came from God to Jesus to an angel to him. A marvelously strange book, Revelations, no matter how you look at it.

To know what is meant by the second death, we must know what is meant by the first death. To know what is meant by the first death, we must know what is meant by "victorious." In this context (the spiritual), victorious means one who is born again, a concept which is spurned and often maligned as a flag waved by nutty fanatics misaligned with reality and the true world of McDonald's and the Donald.

Born again. First one is born of water (the amniotic sac and its fluid) and then of spirit. One's consciousness opens to a reality that is wider and deeper, a reality that is eternal since it is forever present, the Ground and Source of the eternal unfolding of Being, the Wellspring and the springing of the life-force (spirit).

When one opens to this higher, wider, deeper awareness, to eagle consciousness in addition to mouse consciousness, one dies the first death. One's old self falls into the underworld, is dismembered, then re-membered into unforeseen understandings. One sees and knows. One's eyes are open. The second death, that of the physical body, cannot and does not harm one. One is already born into "the other side." All one's treasures are already "laid up in heaven."

In this world today, folk, hardly even believing in the lint in their own belly button, hate this kind of language. But one can only speak of these things with poetry and metaphor.

When you have died before you die, death cannot harm you.

notes on misunderstoodness

2009-09-24T01:50:00.018-07:00

"I often looked at myself with furious discontent, which verged on loathing, and so I inwardly attributed the same feeling to everyone." Dostoyevsky, Notes from the Underground

"I'm just a soul whose intentions are good.
Oh Lord! Don't let me be misunderstood." -- Nina Simone

I continue to notice that the world gets along, promotes itself, energizes itself through misunderstandings -- the world of the individual as well as the world of groups and the world of nations.

Many do not wish, even if they could, to come to a full understanding of themselves or of others because the game would be over.

Harmonious understanding among one's angels and demons, of one's multiple aspects of personality, of one's thoughts and emotions and actions and relationships is seen as undesirable. Conflict and misunderstanding are kept alive as a way of feeling alive.

Harmony is mistrusted. Misunderstanding is a way of staying "safe."

Most everyone feels misunderstood. That is partly because all the folk around the misunderstood one feel misunderstood. "Misunderstand others as they misunderstand you."

When one feels/thinks another person understands them, that person becomes a friend or a life partner. Both friendship and marriage are based upon the continuous working out of misunderstandings.

Understand means to stand under the other person's stance, to take the low ground, to put the other "above" yourself at least for a while. It is best if the other person does the same. You continue standing under each other's stance in the world. Somehow standing under each other's stance allows that stance to loosen and to change.

A little boy, maybe three years old, sat on his mother's lap on the bus yesterday as I took my weekly pilgrimage to the physical therapist healer woman. Our eyes met with understanding. We smiled spontaneously and simultaneously. He was enjoying a lemon lollipop and without hesitation reached his arm out and offered it to me. We both laughed. We understood each other.

i'm mad as hell

2009-09-23T06:13:00.004-07:00

A call for your story
of struggles with anger.

Don't just go over there
and be a voyeur.
Talk with the man.
Give him your comment.

keeping your head about you

2009-09-23T01:43:00.005-07:00

A popular conception is that the mind is inside the body.

At least two judgments have been made here. One is that the mind and body are two separate "things." So we have the phenomenon of our being aware that we have (or are) a mind and a body. Now we are three: awareness, mind, and body. And now that we are aware of our awareness, we are four. And now that we are aware that we are aware of our awareness, we are five. There is no logical end to this splitting, though experientially we stop because we get a splitting headache, a metaphysical migraine, or we say pshaw! (folk do still say that don't they?), pshaw! the floor needs vacuuming.

The second judgment we have made is that our mind is nestled "in" the body, somewhere around the head usually. But as Douglas Harding has pointed out, if we observe more closely, we have no head. Everyone else does, but I (or you) do not. Where there should be a head is a wide open space, as wide and as open as the entire universe. For many, I suppose, that proves too scary. Also it is societally unacceptable. We are supposed to behave as if we are small units with little heads. No one expects more than that and we tend to go along with expectations.

Our mind is not inside our body. Our body is inside our mind.

And to take it even a step further, or really a few steps back before the splitting: What body? What mind?

dying to love

2009-09-22T02:01:00.017-07:00

I continue to struggle with what love is. I hear I have to die to find out. I know what that means and part of me does not want to do it; sometimes does it, but does not want to fully take the plunge.

Surrender. This is what it means. The warrior's paradox. Die before you die. Be dead, be thoroughly dead. Die to know what love is. Today is a good day to die. Greater love has no man than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.

Aha! My struggle is not with knowing what love is. My struggle is with surrender, with dying in order to love. I have the power to choose my death. What better choice than to die for love, to die so I can love, to die so that I am love. But that is not love, it is saving my own butt by becoming love.

I must simply surrender. No surrendering in order to. I surrender to the Love that breathes me, that beats my trembling heart. Complete surrender. This is love.

juicy concepts and boundless bounds

2009-09-21T01:25:00.018-07:00

"As Dogen might say, rather than eliminate concepts, we need to 'liberate' them!--which requires, of course, that we do not cling to any particular set." -- David Loy, Nonduality

Each of us embraces a set of religio-philosophical concepts ("I am like this, the world is like that, life is like this, death is like that"). And these concepts embrace us, set bounds to our thinking and thus our experiencing, while simultaneously providing and giving focus to the juice, the elan vital, the spirit and energy that makes us lively.

The concepts by which we see and define the world are not dry, dull philosophical terminology, but provide membranous bounds and definition to our energetic core. Our concepts direct and focus the energy that we are. They contain our juice.

Our character is formed, is evident by the set of concepts that we have glommed onto in life (and that have glommed onto us). For example, the religion that we swear to (and yes, I still see atheism as a religion; every way of thinking one subscribes to is a religion) is composed of a set of concepts that explains the world.

The fundamentalists of each grouping of juicy concepts believe their set of concepts is the only set capable of world explanation and all the others miss the mark. More realistically, the set of concepts each person employs and is employed by is juicy for that person (and the group to which they belong), which is wonderful and to be deeply appreciated and en-joy-ed.

As you know, if you have been reading these blog postings over the years, I have been and continue making myself conversant with as many religio-philosophical systems as possible. I enjoy learning all the concepts by which people and peoples define themselves.

But how does a person contain all these concepts? I have been "converted" to each conceptual system of understanding, otherwise I could not understand them. (There is no such thing as an objective observer.) But now what? All these religions congregate in my pre-dawn room and call to me and each other and converse. Each wants me to be an adherent to it and it alone. I can see the sanity of that advice.

So I fly higher, beyond all conceptual schema. The consciousness that I am lives in the realm of the Unborn. Not two! Not two! Not even one! All the religions sitting here laugh and swirl upward in one interwhirling, keeping their identity while opening to no bounds.

the current of the cosmos

2009-09-20T00:02:00.013-07:00

The cosmos is born of one Spirit, is one Spirit, and is moving toward one Spirit. Those of us in the space-time dimension of earthly everydayness are being carried right along with it. (Out of all the theologies, process theology recognizes this. So does the work of Teilhard de Chardin.) And we are not just helpless fragments caught in the current (unless we frag ourselves). We are the current.

There are those who are fearful and screaming and yelling and footdragging and sabotaging as much as possible, wanting things to stay the same on earth with clear division lines, meaning that they and their kin stay in ascendancy and keep others beneath their feet. If "love" is to be made, then it will be made only in the missionary position, with others on the bottom.

Mister Awake was right when he said (and I paraphrase) that three ingredients clog the artery of the cosmic current: hostility, greed, and stupor. What allows current flow is lovingkindness, generosity, and radiant awareness.

If wide awake lovingkindness is the order of the day, what does one do with the smug and hating stuporous? Jesus was not diverted. Gandhi was not diverted. Teresa of Avila was not diverted. Martin Luther King was not diverted. Arjuna was diverted only for an instant, then rose up, and kept on rolling. Marguerite Porete was not diverted. A whole host of unnamed folk across the centuries and cultures were not and are diverted.

What does one do? Let the dead bury the dead and keep on trucking!

bhutan video on pbs tomorrow (sunday)

2009-09-19T11:39:00.004-07:00

My friend Tom Vendetti, a former Flagstaff and Sedona resident, who has trekked many beautiful spots on the globe, especially Tibet, Nepal, Maui, Fiji, Bhutan, and has created world-class videos concerning each site, will have his Bhutan: Taking The Middle Path To Happiness shown this Sunday, September 20 (tomorrow) on PBS at 3 PM.

Tom goes places that others do not dare, gains entry and interviews, and brings the experiences back to the rest of us in his beautiful and carefully constructed videos. Do yourself a favor. Take a look.

activation of spiritual energy

2009-09-19T05:32:00.011-07:00

I don't care whether you call it natural or supernatural or no name at all, there is a power that exists that allows us to move through any obstacle, to find the remedy to any problematic situation, including the one we are in on earth today.

It is the Energy, the LifeForce, the Spirit, the Chi, the Ki, the Prana, the Mana, the Baraka. Every culture has a name for it.

It doesn't matter what you call it, as long as you call it. And it doesn't matter if you are a Hindu or a Baptist, a flower child or a cynic, an African or an Icelander, skinny or tubby, crawling on all fours or walking with a cane, up and jumping or confined to bed, when you open to it and you call it, it will come. And when two or more call together, power is born.

Those proficient in the martial arts, the healing arts, the spiritual arts know this deeply.

the evolution of human consciousness

2009-09-18T06:16:00.005-07:00

So-called mysticism, or cosmic consciousness, is simply the leaping ahead to the inevitable -- the opening of human awareness to the comprehension that we are the cosmos birthing itself. And that the "physical" energies our sciences (still at a primitive level) so proudly manipulate are overshadowed by the major energy of the cosmos, a "spiritual" energy called Love. Love is birthing us, Love is who we are, and Love is our home. The consciousness state of individuality and separation is but a phase in this unfolding. Convergence, coherence, and inclusion are the major forces of the cosmos. Love will win out in the crises of today. Love never fails.

cosmos

2009-09-17T13:57:00.005-07:00

Hubble is back! See some of the photos here.

when the cognoscenti become the many

2009-09-17T11:15:00.010-07:00

My writings are primarily for the future,
not fitting into the cogno-scape of the day,
except for those who remember
how it was, how it is, and how it will be yet again
when the cognoscenti become the many
and planetary consciousness and cosmic citizenry
become the norm.

The spiritual energy we call love will make it so,
when we open, when we fully open.

The human species continues to be born.

the heartmind and the headbrain

2009-09-17T08:52:00.003-07:00

The heartmind exists in the realm of the interwhirling, is sensitive to the rhythms of universal information both here-and-now and outside space-time dimensions.

The headbrain processes information in its dualistic language and spits out answers which are moment-arily satisfying and which always lead to, provide stepping stones for, new questions.

The headbrain helps promote ego -- the imaginative sense of separate self which bolsters itself with pride and self-importance against its inherent loneliness and ignore-ance.

The heartmind lives with no barriers of separation though it has its own centering core: a universe openly and freely relating with other universes while simultaneously maintaining its own identity.

As a result, the heartmind with its capaciousness continuously processes information of which the headbrain has no clue, and if it does, attempts to reduce heartmind awareness to a mathematical formula, a dogma, or a creed, some toothpick in the vast ocean of Being to which it clings with defiant desperation.

Our society is evolving into a planetary society and to do so, must shift from headbrain reliance (ratio-nal thought) to our larger and truer brain, the heartmind. The heartmind does not toss away the headbrain, but takes it under its wing, giving it the comfort and security it seeks while listening to its peeps.

the querying of the quest

2009-09-17T04:17:00.015-07:00

I suppose if one looks closely, one will see that every life has a theme, a major underlying quest-ion that points like an arrow at its target. For me, it has been: what is the nature of the universe? This quest opens into three queries: who am I? where am I? what is going on?

It seems to me that many if not most folk get that understood early on and settle down to the busyness of life. But I am still the twelve-year-old boy that was lifted into space from his home in Alabama and shown the earth from afar. Let's call it my cosmic experience. It was the year I received confirmation (but not in a manmade church) as a cosmic citizen.

Making sense of that experience has been and is the quest of my life.

On this quest I did not succumb to the temptation to wrap myself in robes of holiness, keeping contact with earth by a thin string anchoring my spiritual balloon to some post. I found later that some of the Buddhist scriptures warn against this, saying that one can choose to go off into Bliss and sit there but eventually you gotta come back and start your journey again where you left off.

Instead I learned the language of science, of rigorous methodology, of experimental design, and of probability and statistical proof. Got good at it too. My early research on nonverbal behavior is still in the literature. Though it did not satisfy, my sticking my head into the science pencil sharpener made its point: ratio-nal consciousness is good but does not and can not go far enough. It has its limitations.

I discovered the heartmind. Well, I didn't really discover it, since it has always been here. I just had an Un-Duh moment. Our ancestors (many of whom were more in touch with these matters than we are in our present dark age) spoke of "thinking in your heart" and they were correct. The heart as a brain is about 40 times more powerful in sensitivity to information than the slab of meat in our head. Together (which is the way it truly works) they are a formidable team.

In making sense of that cosmic experience I have poked my nose, then entered with full body, into many realms. I will share some of that research. with its use of what Ewert Cousins called "shamanistic epistemology" in posts to come.

Meanwhile, here is a quest-ion for you. What is the quest you are on? I am not necessarily looking for responses on this blog. I just think it is a powerfully important question and well worth everyone's consideration and re-consideration.

total abandon

2009-09-16T01:32:00.008-07:00

All I care for is to know Christ . . .
Phil. 3:10
For me to live is Christ . . .
Phil. 1:21

What is Christ but the incarnation of our Source, the honoring of and the living as the Breath that breathes us, the Breath that calls us into Being? Who are we but the embodying of the Spirit, the Lifeforce that animates the entirety of the universe, the cosmos?

All I care for is to know Christ, and to not put that burden and that blessing of Christness upon some lone figure out there in historical and mythical time, but to open to the Christness of my own being, to this fragile yet enduring incarnation that I am, the only incarnation that I know from inside out.

For me to live is Christ, to live as the incarnation of Spirit that I am, to live as this particular heartbeat of suffering and forgiveness and love, incarnated in this body, this body that pays the bills, raises the children, drives in traffic, faces loneliness and pain, sheds tears of joy, this body that is Spirit Itself incarnate.

I open in total abandon to the Breath that breathes me, to the Father and the Mother, and as the Son and as the Daughter. All I care for is to know the Christ that I am and the Christ that I am not. The two walk as one, close friends.

the church of the eternal chevy pickup

2009-09-15T02:34:00.011-07:00

once upon a time there was a man who lived in stark reality, black and white, and up was up and down was down and by god don't give him any of that all is relative stuff because he had always had trouble with his relations anyway and he prided himself on his hardheaded stubbornness and believed that once fooled always a fool and he had been fooled many times, made a fool of himself over other people mostly and got hurt and closed his heart and said what heart? the head is where it's at, and kept strict accounting of everything and lived in ledger domain thanking god, except he knew there wasn't one, that he wasn't foolish anymore like all them others until a chevy pickup almost run him down one day and the startle sent a lightning flash unbolting his pentupness and he fell to the ground weeping and sobbing and couldn't hold himself together anymore, see him over there? his head all exploded into radiant glory and the vast unseen, wondering why people take life so serious, making things so grave, and thinking about starting a church of the eternal chevy pickup but saying nah! everybody has to get run down by their own vehicle

some guy with strange eyes

2009-09-15T02:33:00.002-07:00

new blog in town

on the hoof

2009-09-14T02:34:00.015-07:00

Qui ambulat simpliciter
ambulat confidenter.
He that walks simply
walks confidently.
-- Proverbs 10: 9

My left rear hoof needs a bone or two broken, aligned, reset. It will be done. After the surgeon gives me the boot and I accept it as gracefully as possible, without too much kicking against the pricks (vivid imagery with its dual meaning in my unsanctified mind as I entertained myself in church with Bible punnery as a young man), I can perhaps walk more simply and more confidently.

Solvitur Ambulando (salvation through walking around) has been my motto throughout life. If Life imitates Art (such as in "How Great Thou Art"), then my left rear foot in the spiritual world has also been hobbled. Some kind of holding back? Such as Achilles' mother holding him by the heel for his cosmic dip, the holding part forever vulnerable to life's vicissitudes? The undipped unbaptized part being not only one's place of wounding but also the spot where one gets a grip on one's humanness? Ah! You see how my mind wanders and rambles, always walking around, always responding with a vigorous Yes! to the bully question "Wanna make something of it?"

Solvitur Ambulando! Soon I will have my hoof broken and then reclaimed, redeemed. It has already happened to my heart more than once, so I kind of know what to expect. My heart gets around pretty well, walking through most any landscape. I expect my hoof will do the same.

a first step in transformation

2009-09-13T12:34:00.003-07:00

A first step in transformation is to imagine yourself as different. If you cannot imagine yourself as different, you will not transform. If you cannot imagine yourself as different, it is because you will not. No matter your protestations to the contrary, you are willing to stay the same. In so doing you are willing your inertia and your corpse-ification. A first step in transformation is imagining your self as different.

faith and creativity

2009-09-13T11:02:00.001-07:00

If we have faith in an imagined universe, that universe will be real, and will become real to others as they in turn have faith in it. This is the basis of all religions, including the religions of capitalism, of science, and of the "background" religion we know as society.

cognitive hairdo's

2009-09-13T07:10:00.005-07:00

Have you considered that your thought structure allows only certain thoughts of a certain nature and prohibits all others? That your thought structure is dictated to by the thought community to which you swear allegiance? That the thoughts corralled within your thought structure are limited by the extent of your vocabulary and by whether you are satisfied with a superficial layer of meaning of that (limited) vocabulary or plumb each word's depths?

Have you considered that even your lamenting over enlightenment and unenlightenment is shaped by what you have heard and read? Have you ever had an original thought? Would you know it if you had?

At some point, this society's deep belief in matter and that only matter matters will be looked upon as quaint and weird. The enlightened thought structure and thought style of today will be tomorrow's museum curiosity. Yes, these cognitive hairdo's of which we either do not give a thought or are unjustifiably proud will be shellacked and placed on the head of a different type of dummy.

I had a vision some years back. I was standing on a board in the "midst" of infinity, infinity in all "directions." I was holding another board. My only task was to put the board I was holding "down" any "place," any place at all. Then to step over on that board, pick up the first one, and continue my "journey." It was very heartening and I laughed ( and still do ) a lot.

trance substantiation

2009-09-13T01:19:00.008-07:00

Words are living entities we so often gloss over with unseeing eyes as we hasten to maintain our point of view. Seeking entertainment or confirmation in our hypnotic complacency, we will not risk or allow any slow-motion explosion, any depth charge that shakes our very core. We insist that we read the words, making them mean what we will, once again colonizing the world around us with our clones. No. We must let the words read us, reveal our blindness, our protected realms of vapid stupor. A good sentence well read is marked with eye prints of blood.

i sit here laughing happily

2009-09-12T00:51:00.026-07:00

Oddly enough, it is my recent questing into the comprehension of Islam (through the writings of Ibn 'Arabi, Henry Corbin, and William Chittick in particular) that has led me into the re-discovery that I am a Christian. Perhaps not so surprising to a disinterested observer who would merely point out the power of contrast in highlighting the obvious.

Not only is Christianity my birthright and birth rite (being both physically and then spiritually born into its milieu), which I am neither capable nor desirous of trading for a bowl of someone else's porridge, no matter now excellent its ingredients and its taste, it is also the prime illumination of my heart and intellect. This does not mean I belong to a religious sect that has been around for only two thousand years. What I am pointing to begins before the first outbreathing of space and time.

I both comprehend and am comprehended by Jesus the Christ, a powerful embodying of the divine and a radiant expression of the human. I am in love with the fierce and tender-hearted mystic prophet teacher, embodying of the living Source, great warrior and compassionate and humorous friend, Jesus. Don't worry, I won't come knocking on your door with religious tracts. I'm too busy sweeping around my own doorstep, attending to my own ever-ongoing conversion and re-vision.

I sit here laughing happily, the moon peeping in the window as it often does. Contained by no category, simply being and reflecting the Light that Is.

Meanwhile I continue my studies of Islam. We all need to understand each other's path these days, especially these days in which we live so closely together. We need to continue learning to speak each other's language and the spiritual languages are the most powerful of all.

"Nobody has a monopoly on the whole" -- Raimon Panikkar

i look at the moon

2009-09-11T00:29:00.019-07:00

I look at the moon and I am happy.

I look at the moon and understand the forming and the revealing of the Absolute.

The Absolute likes to form as circles, as orbs, likes to travel in ellipses and spirals, smilingly flows as water and as ocean waving.

The Absolute likes to fall back on Itself, surprise Itself, likes to restrict Itself in our stubborn hardheadedness and release Itself in our open warm hearts.

The only manifestation of the Absolute I can truly know is myself. I am a forming and a revealing of the Absolute.

I look at the moon and I understand. I look within and I am happy.

babes in the manger

2009-09-10T06:51:00.010-07:00

"... but what can be said for our knowledge of man, of homo sapiens, so long as we know nothing of the invisible regions that have been explored nor of the explorers themselves?" -- Henry Corbin, Spiritual Body and Celestial Earth

How startled we are when we discover that the "exterior" world, the world of appearance, is a veil covering Vast Reality; that the world we count on is but a symbolic world arising from the Vast Infinite, a metaphorical world pointing to the Deep Realms that birth it.

The babe is lying in the manger, and we tend to worship the manger, the eatery.

But this is not a wailing and a flailing of humanity. This is a reminder. We live in a world of appearance produced by our limited sensory information and our limited structural thought.

Each of us is the babe born in the manger, a babe with all the forces of the Divine within it and behind it, backing it; a babe whose only job is to receive the spiritual energies that feed and nourish and to continue to grow in heartful wisdom and understanding. Right action naturally flows out of such nourishment.

gary's color photos

2009-09-09T16:24:00.004-07:00

These photos by Gary Karcz are splendid.
Gary lived in Flagstaff and has now moved to California.
Do yourself a favor and take a look.

After viewing the color photos,
click on his Home page
and enjoy his black and whites.

the deep calls to the deep

2009-09-09T09:00:00.006-07:00

Each of us is born into a particular world view, into a community of "believers" who from our first insuction of breath permeate us with "the way the world is." I suspect most of us on the planet do not question this sectarian world view and go through life happily believing "this is the way the world is" and, if we even think about it, feel sorry or angry or confused about those poor ignorant slobs out there who've got it all wrong.

My predilection, however, is to look at each major world view that exists on the planet, and to listen carefully to the worldviews expressed in the language and stance of each individual I meet. It is said that the deep calls to the deep. I have found that to be so.

It is as if the Deep (I capitalize here to refer to the deepest of the deep) opens its understandings, its wisdom to all peoples, all cultures; in effect, the Deep calls to the deep in each human clustering of tribal kin with that clustering's particular language and consciousness state. Then that cultural grouping describes the Deep and the wisdom of the Deep as clearly and poetically as possible given the group's language structure and conscious awareness.

I deeply enjoy reading and absorbing the reflections on and from the Deep that differ from my birth culture. As a result I have become a Zen Baptist Hindu Islamic Sufi Taoist Abrahamic Pagan Barbarian Jesusian Humanist Wankatankan Scientist Cosmologist. All those manifestations of the Deep call with one voice. There is such a thing, my psychology and psychiatry friends, as multiple personality order.

chaos and order and the cosmos and God

2009-09-09T01:20:00.013-07:00

We are both chaotic and orderly creatures (though some might object to "creature" since it invokes "creation" and "creator" and in no possible sense can they yield to their imaginative thrust that there is a God). Chaotic and orderly we are, whether you think of us as creatures or no. We are forever "falling to pieces" and "pulling ourselves together."

This habitual mode of dissolution and resolution may be a major prompt for the belief in various forms of reincarnation. The final act in our "strutting and fretting" on this present stage will be and is dissolution. Our anticipation is that it will be immediately followed by our coming back together again but in other realms: fire or light or the lull of infinitely lapping waves on a distant shore or the same-o-same-o with perhaps more sensitive and open awareness.

Chaos and order. Some of us prefer one over the other. You know the extremes and may even be a living embodiment of one -- either resenting the fact that your chaotic endeavoring inevitably falls into a routine, or that your orderly approach to life is only an approach, never culminating in the supreme orgasm and splendor of everything staying in its place.

Depending on your language, we are re-presentations of the cosmos, or made in the image of God. As we go, so goes the cosmos. As we are, so is God. (As above, so below. As within, so without.) It is quite easy to to infer that the observed cosmos is both chaotic and orderly, but quite another step to infer that the unseen Source is also both chaotic and orderly.

The Buddhists say form is emptiness and emptiness is form. My mind resonates well with that. There is something quite heartening about it. But I don't think it works well to say order is chaos and chaos is order. I think order and chaos fit on the form side of the equation, that order and chaos are correlates of form. One has, in one instance, form in order, and in the other, form in chaos.

So if you believe in God (and I believe that God believes in us more than we believe in Him), then only that aspect of God which is form would be chaotic and orderly. That leaves the aspect of God which is emptiness. And that opens to an entirely different discussion.

shifting gears

2009-09-08T01:52:00.022-07:00

In opening to the borning of new consciousness, we step outside the bounds of the known. The leap into the abyss. All hope with its laying of track into a future is abandoned. A hope chest is a drag. Containing hypnotic zombies. Throw it on the fire. What fire? That fire burning in the heart! The creative advance, some call it. The advance of creation, the ongoing process of the birthing of the cosmos. That little me, the one we each so carefully construct? Ditched! Compost! History! We step outside all bounds of the known. This vehicle has only two gears. Stagnation! Leap!

labor day thoughts

2009-09-07T00:33:00.038-07:00

The history of the nation-state has been that anyone who raises a significant ruckus against the ruling powers will be silenced. Silencing action includes ridicule, threat, co-option, and murder, the latter done either through anonymity or openly by the state, in which case it is not called murder, but execution.

We are a nation of sheep, led to fleecing and to slaughter every day. As a reward we are given enough chits to trade for our sheep essentials at the sheep store owned, operated, and financed, not by wolves, but sheep with balls and fangs.

The spiritual advisers of yesteryear said yep, that's the way it is, so render your butt to Caesar and give your soul to God: a Prey-and-Pray convenience store on every spiritual corner.

This entire planet is based upon eating and being eaten. Every eater considers it just and right and proper that the eaten maintain steady entry into their maw and gullet. Few eaters look to see they also are the eaten.

In the sheepish food cycle mentality of the planet, we refuse to see that the god we worship has great grinding jaws. Whether it be the god of materiality, the god of success, the god of excess, or even the god of love. For what is love but the laying down of one's life for others so they may successfully feed?

Rumors are flying about the coming apocalypse. Not to worry. It's nothing new. It's just Prey-and-Pray on a larger scale. You'll fit right in. And become part of the cosmic grin.

"Apocalypso Honey, wipe your mouth. You've got something on your chin!" "Oh, no problem, that was just George."

Chomp chomp slurp slurp -- the mantra of our age.

boomerang

2009-09-06T00:17:00.017-07:00

"You, O so-and-so, are the effect of your cause" -- Ibn 'Arabi

Those words make my heart laugh at the vision of the circularity of ourselves. If I am the effect of my cause, I had better know what my cause is. And I do not mean how I was created or came into being. I mean my cause, that which I champion and campaign for.

For example, if my cause is to justify myself in my own eyes and in the eyes of others, then I am the effects of my eternal self-justifying, spinning in a sacrificial loop, and that which is sacrificed is my life.

If my cause is the opening of awareness to the knowing of the Wellspring of my being, then I am the effects of this awareness and this knowing, living with contentment, well-being, and happiness, yes, even joy, in an eternal relational loop, a friend of God. The effect of my cause is met and uplifted, soaring on a spiraling updraft into ever-greater intimacy and disclosure.

"You, O so-and-so, are the effect of your cause."

painful determination

2009-09-05T04:43:00.007-07:00

The juxtaposition of spirit and matter brings peculiar situation. Such as pain. Matter pain does not affect spirit, perhaps its outer perimeter, but not its inner core. "Curse God and die!" said the folk surrounding Job. "Let your spirit be overwhelmed." "No way," said Job.

De-termination means marshaling all one's forces against termination. "This is not over." "This is not ended!"
The eternal Oh Yeah!?

The body suffers and the spirit hovers. Hovers over the face of the deep, refuses to be sucked in, brings life out of the pain itself.

An old meaning of suffer is allow, such as in "Suffer the little children to come unto me." Suffering is a delicate balance between allowing the pain while hovering above and beyond the pain and when possible sending one's blessings to the matter at the core of the pain.

This applies to both physical and mental pain.

the nerve of the monkey

2009-09-04T02:50:00.008-07:00

"... for you are the temple of the living God" (2 Corinthians 6:16)

Hoo! Now there's a powerful statement! Startling! At the inner core of the temple is the Holy of Holies, the place where even the spit of sardonic humor evaporates, the site of the bone marrow of the cosmos, of the central nervous system and its core Nerve that no one dares or wishes to touch.

At one time It was hidden by a veil. The one priest / attendant / servant who went behind the veil to this awe full place risked his life each time. A rope was tied to one of his ankles in case he was struck dead so his body could be pulled out.

This holy fire burns at the core of us. We are too busy being monkeys to see or notice it, even though the veil of the temple has been split in two, torn apart, and all that is holy has been revealed -- in all cultures and traditions.

All secrets are out in the open. We are the temple of the living God, the springing of the Wellspring, the embodying of Spirit. And still we monkey around.

Now I'm all for the monkey. I'm an excellent monkey myself. But the monkey has his place. Reminds me of the story of the monkey and Buddha. As I recall, it goes something like this. The monkey was bragging of his prowess to Buddha. He told Buddha that since he was a magnificent leaper, he could leap beyond Buddha (who in this story was a manifestation of Spirit, of Awareness with a capital A).

Mister Awareness smiled and said okay, do it. But how will I know where you have leaped? You have to leave some sign. Mister Monkey said, I will take a piss at the exact spot of my landing. And zoom! Off he went in a mighty leap, passing through infinity after infinity, and landing at a pillar surrounded by vast nothing. He peed upon it and jumped back.

Well, how was that, Mister Awareness Dude? he swaggered. The Buddha held up his hand. At the base of one of his fingers was what looked and smelled suspiciously like fresh monkey piss.

We are not so great as we think we are. We are greater. Because at our core is the sacred altar, the altar of the Holy Fire. And no matter how much we piss around, It continues to Burn.

my first little twitter-format novel baby

2009-09-03T04:42:00.008-07:00

I bring my first attempt at a twitter-format novel (each chapter required to be 140 characters or less, including spaces) from psychopomp to here because I am happy with the way it unfolded in its telling of the tale of East meets West, because I want to see it in its book-like form rather than the inverse form that the blogging format requires, and because I want to share it with a wider audience.

chapter 1
Mountain trail. Sheer drop right. Cliff face left. Wind blasts, shrieking energy threatening footing. Nothing personal. But real.

chapter 2
Around hairpin. Out of wind. Safety. What!? Piercing luminous eyes matching his. No advance. No retreat. Heart thumping fear rage. Impasse.

chapter 3
Nietzsche laughed. Ironic bitter joy. Was this his doppelganger, his death twin? His doom and salvation in one package. He moved in.

chapter 4
Japan opens doors. Tesshu leaps through. “Zen warrior relentless openness seeks Prussian intellectual fire.” Fair trade.

chapter 5
2 yamabushi clash. Mountain warriors. Highest peaks of awareness. Alpine thought sword, Fuji no-thought sword. Stand-off. Zanshin.

chapter 6
Thinking! rails Nietzsche. Not-thinking! thunders Tesshu. Swords locked they stand. 1 and 0 in eternal combat.

chapter 7
USA. Two bulls. Dakota field. Horns locked, eyes bulging, foreheads bleeding, snot and drool, shit running down back legs. Relentless.

chapter 8
No backing up. Sheer cliff face. No backing down. Sheer abyss drop. The two masters see no opening. No way to close.

chapter 9
Alpine clash. An eagle flies down, rests on their immovable X-crossed blades. Without-thinking, it sighs. Flies away.

chapter 10
"Without-thinking!" the two cogno-warriors simul-shouted, tossing philosoph-swords into abyss. Laughing and pounding each other’s back.

the end
the end

the hole that will not be filled

2009-09-03T02:34:00.012-07:00

You have done well in life. You have your setup -- a place to sleep, food, transportation, a bathroom, clothes, all the stuff you need and more -- and still it does not satisfy. There is a hole in the middle of you. A vast gaping yawning hole. You distract yourself from it with friends, romance, music, family, staying busy and on the move, chocolate, alcohol, weed, prescription drugs, sex, politics, religion, your popsicle stick collection. But always when you let your guard down, there it is. The hole that cannot be filled.

What is this hole? I will tell you but you will fight against it. Or refuse to understand, which is a form of fight. This hole is your hole-liness, your holiness.

Holiness, a way of being that is out of favor and also drastically misunderstood, is not, as commonly viewed, an expansion of your personality into beatific realms, is not the you you think you are gloriously magnified. Nor is holiness that thing we project upon certain figures of the past and present with awe and admiration, something we aspire to, but know we will never have.

For holiness is not something you have, it is what you are. You are hole-y. What is this hole? It is you before you were born, before you put yourself together in the form of the magnificent and peculiar personality you are now -- the persona that refuses to be annihilated, that is terrified and angry at such a thought.

We speak of black holes and worm holes and the falling through them into other realities. They are real. And are "out there." And are "in here."

Hole-liness is opening without reservation and with total abandon to the hole that cannot be filled. "Behind" us and "within" us is sheer infinity. Hole-liness is acknowledging and opening as the infinity we are before we were born into form, the infinity we shall always be, and to which we shall return. That hole is your cosmic navel.

This is not a call to navel gazing as a life style. The world we are now "in" is a training arena, a place for action and doing, for learning by endeavor. Instead of shifting into anxiety or despair or both at the presence of the hole existing at your core, love it, appreciate it, draw upon its strength and power. No sword can cut it. No force on earth can even begin to touch it. Take time to be hole-y and move on through the day.

the absurd

2009-09-02T05:07:00.004-07:00

The absurd and the logical sit in synthrony.

The absurdist is the supreme logician
and the supreme logician is essentially absurd.

The mocking of all bounds is bounded by its mocking.
The laughter comes from knowing this is so.

In the school cafeteria at whose table shall I sit?
The logical absurdists or the absurd logicians?

Hmm... that choice, if forced, is absurdly easy.
I'll sit with the ones with sandwiches made of wry.

the spirit of the law

2009-09-02T03:17:00.005-07:00

Just as the Unseen gives birth to the Apparent (Appearance), so Spirit gives birth to Law. Spirit has always been beyond and before Law. Law is derived from Spirit and thereby has, and always will have, second place.

We need and respect Law. We follow it as best we can, but we are ruled by Spirit and not Law. Law may be etched in stone, but as Moses showed when he threw the tablets of the Law to the ground, Law is breakable. And it is Spirit that breaks it up.

Somtimes Law sets itself up as a cross for crucifixion of Spirit. But the nails do not hold and no corpse is ever found. It is Law that is a corpse which must be continually revived, brought to life, vivified by Spirit.

Law uses force to enforce its will. Spirit uses nothing but Itself.

The perfect world would be where Law accurately reflected Spirit, but then Law would not be needed.

dancing the apocalypso

2009-09-01T01:54:00.025-07:00

Are we truly approaching the end time? Is the human race about to cross the finish line, with any remnant running with the screaming meemies into a long dark night? Will everyone blow their nukes simultaneously? Will all the folk at the checkout counter pull their weapons and kill everyone ahead of them, especially the lady with all the coupons buried deep in the bottom of her purse? Has Gaia finally reached irritation saturation with the multitudinous flea bites Homo Erectus has imposed upon her and is about to apocalypt us into submission? Is the calendar coming to an end, no more pages to flip, no next month's picture with its cute kittens?

Are all the doomsday predictions about to come true? Are we about to commit mass suicide and the moon turn to blood and Jesus split the skies with a sick headache and a thirst for justice? Should you be stocking up on crates of Spam? Have we painted ourselves into a corner and are about to die from the toxic fumes? Will we end with a bang and a whimper? Is it a self-fulfilling prophecy from which someone will have to pry our cold dead fingers? Are our fates sealed? Is the human species one more experiment the universe has tried, is trying, with non-publishable results?

Are we about to dance the Apocalypso?

We live in two worlds -- the world of Appearance and the world of the Unseen. The realm of the Unseen gives birth to, is the source of the world of Appearance. The world of Appearance has always been on fire. Ever-changing, ever-shifting. In the world of Appearance, we cry peace where there is no peace.

The world of Appearance is forever apocalyptic, a world based on dualism and opposition, a consciousness state of division, at war with itself. As our consciousness states go, so goes the world.

We, as individuals and as a species, are being called to live in both realms simultaneously: the realm of Appearance and the realm of the Unseen. We have forced this call upon ourselves by pushing to the limit our living in the world of Appearance and the world of Appearance alone.

It is time to quit farting around and make a leap of consciousness here, to awaken into the reality of the Unseen, to center our consciousnesses firmly in the Unseen, while going about our business in the Apparent. I think that is what the Dance of the Apocalypso is all about. And never mind what you think everyone else is going to do. What are you doing with your shifting of consciousness?

the synthronizing of spirit and matter (part 6)

2009-08-31T03:59:00.008-07:00

God is a circle with no circumference whose center is everywhere. And each of us is that center. Our center is a center of the universe of existence. Our center and our Source's center are the same center. This is synthronicity.

God's tricycle

2009-08-31T01:12:00.023-07:00

One story has it that we are the descendants of the rebellious angels, the band of Luciferians who challenged God's seat as the centrality of it all. We were cast out, or really, we cast ourselves out, threw ourselves headlong out of the heaven of unity, of no-separation, of continuous orgasmic bliss into the sorry state we now find ourselves in. We did that (or rather our ancestors did, which amounts to the same thing a la cosmic /karmic/ genetic flow) out of sheer separative will.

We tore (and it wasn't a clean tear; the wound still suppurating) ourselves away and built this place in which we now live; according to this version of the story, a world of illusion which disappears (poof!) the instant we stop believing in it, thus finding ourselves awakening within the realms of cosmic bliss which we never left in the first place, it all being a dream, a nightmare for the most part, though like the frog in the pot of water with ever-increasing heat, we have gotten used to and don't even notice the boiling.

Separation, that's the anguish (and the pride! We are still prideful about it; look mama! look daddy! I can walk alone! Illusion, pure illusion -- no one walks alone), that's the anguish of it from which we distract ourselves by playing with "the 10,000 things" we have fashioned for ourselves.

We didn't get God's seat, but by Jove we have his tricycle! So we pedal around all day in our little human lives feeling mania and despair, trying to fill the unfillable hole while dreaming the impossible dream.

Not a bad story. Touches some nerves here and there. The ending? Oh, we eventually wake up. All is forgiven. And we are home. Home where we have always been. Meanwhile, all THIS is going on. So hop on and pedal that stolen tricycle you are convinced is yours. Look, mommy, look, no hands!

little sharpened pencil points

2009-08-30T12:04:00.008-07:00

Most of us is missing -- in action.
Notice how many "you's" there are in a day,
even in an hour. The varying moods, thoughts, emotions,
persona's. Different in different settings -- the grocery store,
the church, a hiking trail. Now this with this person; now that
with that person. Add up how many "you's" there are in a year.

All are real. For the moments they exist.
Yet all those surface appearances are just that.

Iceberg imagery is appropriate here.
The vastness of you is below the surface.
"They know not what they do," said Jesus.
"The unconscious," said Freud and Jung.
"The It," said Georg Groddeck.
By whatever name, It is unknown.

Missing in action -- that's our story.

We turn around to get a look at this vastness of our being
and wind up whirling dervishes, spinning tops.

Little sharpened pencil points on the page of life.
We get the point. We are the point.
We look to comprehend the pencil,
the vast unseen hand, and the hugeness beyond that.

Sedona Stream

2009-08-30T02:23:00.003-07:00

A stream on a back trail outside Sedona, AZ -- "The renewing of creation at each instant" (Sufi phrase)